insanity

i dunno.. the world seems like a crazy place to be in right now..
wars, materialism, doing crazy amount of fatigue work, being injured and still doing training
i think i'm getting more paranoid..

people have a problem with me smiling too much..
what's wrong with smiling anyway??
not say we have long to live.. who knows i might lose a friend or someone close to me?
want them to know that i'm happy to be with them and around them..

well death seems imminent in life.. when there is a beginning there is an end
but people seem to think that they have a long way more to go in life.. putting crazy amount of training and trying to overcome this obstacle or break that record.. they dun realised that no matter what they do, in the end, they will die and all that they have done is futile.. we are born with nothing and we will move on with nothing..
i think people should be more concerned about the people around them than the things around them.. things are incapable of loving regardless how well you treat it but if u treat someone well and love the person, i believe that the person can appreciate what you have done for him (eventually).. well even if he doesn't, at least one's conscience is clear..
is it necessary to be the best in what you do?? is it necessary to sabotage other people for the sake of one's safety/career? i may be quite useless in many things but i always believe that being able to appreciate people is more important than doing things well at the expense of another person's wellbeing(emotions/career etc)
are we really looking at ourselves and trying to change the world or are we being the obstacles.. i dunno.. i think i'm going to be a hopeless case that appreciates people